You don’t need their approval to be happy!

Posted: December 30, 2016 in Uncategorized


You don’t need their approval to be happy!

Happiness is a choice. You are as happy as you choose to be. What other people think of you cannot rob your happiness unless you allow them to rob it.

It is a fact of life that on our broken planet filled with broken people, there will always be those who will demean how you look, dislike what you do, disapprove of what you believe, dispute what you say, and disrespect who you are. But they cannot control your emotions unless you let them. Disapproval doesn’t have to devastate you. As a pastor, I have talked to so many people who have invested much of their time and energy in trying to please an unappeasable person, most often a parent or other family member. When I ask if all their effort has paid off, the answer is always “no.” I then share the truth that is tough to take at first but is ultimately liberating: “If you haven’t gotten their approval by now, you’re not going to get it. The problem isn’t you. They are the problem. They are unappeasable.” But here is the good news, the truth that will set you free: You don’t need their approval to be happy! So let it go! Stop wasting emotional energy on something that is never going to happen and something that isn’t necessary for you to be happy. They are miserable, but you don’t have to be. There is no sane reason for both of you to be miserable! Instead of focusing on that unappeasable person, refocus on Jesus, who accepts you unconditionally. The more important Jesus becomes to you, the more free you will be from the disapproval of others. Jesus promised it.

John 8:36
36 If the Son therefore shall make you free, ye shall be free indeed.

Getting to know Jesus personally and intimately can free you from many things: the burden of guilt, the poison of resentment, the stress of overwork, the pressure of materialism, the habits of addiction, and the fear of death. But one of the greatest freedoms Jesus offers is being liberated from the fear of disapproval. That is a key to peace of mind. If you are looking to any human being to either make you happy or keep you happy, you are going to be disappointed eventually. No human being has the capacity to meet all your needs and keep you constantly happy. Only God can meet all your needs. No person has the ability to give you all the security, approval, acceptance, and love you need, regardless of what they may promise you. If you expect them to meet needs that only God can meet, you are being unfair to them, you are setting them up for failure, and you are setting yourself up to become bitter. On the other hand, God has repeatedly promised to never forsake you, never abandon you, and never reject you.

The Bible says…

Psalm 27:10
10 When my father and my mother forsake me, then the Lord will take me up.

“Even if my father and mother abandon me, the Lord will hold me close.”

This is a truth you can count on, a solid rock on which you can build your identity, your security, and your happiness.

God has repeatedly promised to never forsake you, never abandon you, and never reject you.


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